Who may ascend into the hill of the LORD? Or who may stand in His holy place? He who has clean hands and a pure heart, who has not lifted up his soul to an idol, nor sworn deceitfully. he shall receive blessing from the LORD, and righteousness from the God of his salvation. This is Jacob, the generation of those who seek Him, Who seek Your face. Selah (Psalm 24:3-6)
With the will of a scrappy fighter, I fight on a daily basis to reach the hill of the Lord. I hate that there is so much “human” in me. I want so much to be pure and holy. To know God as Moses, David, and Paul did. To live in the light of the one who redeemed me. But nay, this fleshly earth suit thwarts me from time to time. What I am learning or what I should have learned earlier in my walk is that I have to be desperate for God, not just when I really need Him, cause we always really need him, but it seems that we really seek him when we are praying for a miracle which includes; financial, medical, family, yadda, yadda.
It is easy to be desperate for God during those times. When it is life or death, we seek God with passion, reason and desire. It is unfortunate that we treat God like this, it’s as if he is our personal genie, we only call on him when we need him. It’s a shame. We are too busy looking for God’s hand of blessing, rather than seeking his holy face. I want to try so hard to be desperate for God in everything. I want to go to the hill! I want to stand in his holy place! I want my hands and heart to be pure! I look at my life and see where I need God, it is easy to see the big things…however my struggle is the little things.
The scripture say “it’s the little foxes that spoil the vine”, we can be so caught up in fixing the big things we neglect, or completely ignore the little things. For me it all comes down to this…for me to reach His hill I need to be completely and utterly desperate for God. That there is nothing I can do to reach his hill, no matter how well, no matter how clean I think my heart and hands are, I cannot do anything good enough to reach his holy place. Thank God that He and only He provided a way to meet him at his place, and I believe the only way is being completely desperate for him.